2013 in Review

I'm feeling nostalgic and have been reflecting on the year 2013 and what I learned. If you're interested, read on, but if not, no pressure. :-)

January: I entered the new year amid smoke and firework in downtown Kandern - like any good German. We did start off with some other "newness" too because 2 new girls joined our small group, and I love them to bits! As a group, during this month, we had our sardine sleepover in my tiny living room and finished our "I Am Second" videos. Theme of this month: New Mercies.

February: Mainly I remember being in two places this month: at school especially for Play Practice, and at Elemenz Cafe (before they closed down). I also managed to retreat to the Rapha House with my beautiful Bible study group. Theme of this month: Friendship.

March: There were some big highlights this month in between the M.S. play performances (Love me some Alvin Fernald), taking the 8th graders hiking to a castle, and BFA hosting ICEC, in which I co-led my first workshop. Theme of the month: Courage.

April: Once Spring Break came to a close, April was fairly routine. A bunch of us did run in the Freiburg marathon, which apart from the cold was pretty fun. Theme of the month: Persistence.

May: Usually, May hits a school year, and someone punches the fast-forward button. I took a jaunt to Austria for a beautiful wedding of two friends. Some of us ran another race that took us through three countries (yes, countries), and nobody died. We braved yet another annual trip with 8th graders to southern Switzerland for a week, and nobody died there either. Theme of this month: Celebration.

June: The most bittersweet month was full of hurrahs and good-byes as we wrapped up another school year. Jill, EmKel, and I topped it off with 8 days in Israel, before I had to hug them both farewell (as well as many others). Theme of the month: Good Closure.

July: A kind soul named "Dad" brought me home for three weeks, so we could celebrate some family milestones, including my parents' 40th anniversary. I got to meet niece Megan, see the new house since the fire, and offer support as brother Andi underwent surgery. Theme of the month: Family.

August: Rachel and I got to spend nearly 2 weeks in gorgeous Marzell with three equally as gorgeous girls. Beyond that, August was fairly slow, and I spent a lot of it at work preparing for the new year. Theme of the month: Rest.

September: The new school year started with a bang. It's always challenging and fun to get to know new staff, new students, new bosses, and everything. Spiritual Emphasis Week generally comes at the perfect time to help me refocus and to help me look past early failures to a brighter future. Theme of this month: Humility.

October: As the leaves began to turn, I particularly enjoyed some new experiences, such as working the Cross Country meet, attending an educational Leadership Conference, and reconnecting with an old friend at a new outdoor museum. My small group girls dove in deeply, and God revealed himself to me in the creativity of my students. Theme of the month: Beauty.

November: 4 Thanksgiving meals are nothing new anymore in this community, but I was thankful for the good people they surrounded me with. Elizabeth and I snuck off to Avignon for a historical trip, and my Bible study group returned to the Rapha House, so I got to use my French. Theme of the month: (no surprise) Gratefulness.

December: The fastest month of the year, always, was particularly peaceful this year. Once the challenge of keeping students focused until the end was over, I actually had time to write, to decorate, to visit local Christmas markets, and to welcome my parents to my home for Christmas. Theme of this month: Focus on Christ.

If you made it this far, I'm impressed. And I would love to know some of the things you learned in 2013. May God's favor rest on you in the New Year as well!

After All, It is a Small World

Last weekend I had the privilege of a three-day mini vacation in Berlin. Back in October, Easyjet offered some amazing deals, and I had my wonderful cousin's apartment to crash in, so even though school was barely on break, I jumped at the chance to visit Germany's capital. I thoroughly enjoyed the sites, the museums, the history, the international food, the culture, and the stories, but one thing happened that I couldn't have planned or initiated if I had tried to.

On the very first day, I signed up for a free walking tour, and we ended up being such a big group, that they decided to split us up. The first guide said he'd take "this crowd over here," and about 20 of us trudged through the rain behind him to a nice view of the Brandenburg Gate where we began said tour. As we walked through the city, people started to strike up small talk conversations with others. I met a nice Scottish couple who now lives in Australia and an American from California just wrapping up her semester abroad. At one point, though, I overheard a woman say she taught at an international boarding school. "Interesting," I thought, "I didn't think they were any others besides BFA in Europe." Due to the course and then eventual end of the tour, I didn't get a chance to chat with her until we were departing from our final stop, and we happened to head off in the same direction.

Our conversation went (almost) exactly as follows:

Me: So, you work at an international boarding school? Me too!
Stranger: Neat. Where?
Me: Here in Germany.
Stranger: My school is in the U.S. But I've lived overseas, too.
Me: Where?
Stranger: In Asia.
Me: Me, too. Where in Asia.
Stranger: In Taiwan.
Me: Me, too.
Stranger: I was there on a Fulbright scholarship.
Me: What?!? Me, too!
Stranger: Okay, this is freaky. Where in Taiwan?
Me: I-Lan Province.
Stranger: Shut up! Me, too. If you say Gu-Ting Elementary with Gloria, I ...
Me: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: ...
Me: ...
(Mouths wide open.)
Stranger: When?
Me: 2004/05
Stranger: I was there in 2008/09. It was weird. When I was there, they kept saying I looked like one of their former teachers, a Katrina.
Me: I'm Katrina!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Needless to say, I was shouting at this point. I mean, what are they odds?! We took a picture to send to Gloria, and then we parted ways, probably never to meet again. Then again ....

What are you fixating on?

The end of November was a bit bumpy. I felt as if either I specifically or a particular group in which I am a member was being excluded or passed over on three particular occasions. It wasn't fun; in fact, it hurt quite a lot. Which then led to frustration and anger and lashing out. And those things pretty much destroy relationships. Not only did I have a hard time interacting with the people who made these decisions, but I had an even harder time sitting down and being close to God. On top of that, things at school took a turn for the worse due to the complaining nature of some of our students. Parents and friends began approaching me on their behalf, saying "Something's wrong - fix it," and the Middle Schoolers themselves became more and more vociferous. It was like a poison spreading its talons throughout our school until all the grades were complaining. About everything.

You get the picture. I was down, grumpy, blue, and there was pressure on me to fix things I couldn't fix, and the things I wanted I wasn't getting.  Of course, that's when God knocked me in the head with truth again: it's never about me. Never. Not even a little bit. At least not when I've dedicated myself to being his servant (which I have). At a small group night in which we joined some other groups for Prayer Stations at school, I rediscovered grace (a fairly regular occurrence in my life). Fixating my life on anything other than my Lord and his grace is cheating myself. It's a small, simple truth with a power to change a life. That night, I penned these words. (As usual, they're still in rough draft form. Forgive me.)

See Jesus
Col. 1:15-23, Hebrews 12:2

Sunlight explodes into refractions of aqua and amber, but I’m too busy analyzing my reflection in the mirror, staring at a dull copper penny despite the open vault of treasures behind me. A pinch here and there, the introspection of my faults incessant, like water left in a sponge. Squeeze hard enough and it will be mine to control, never mind the resonance of a nearby rushing river. Squint a little, move in closer to the mirror, stand on top of an Alpine peak and keep my eyes shut.

Reminisce how I was passed over yet again. List my weaknesses to explain away the pain. Rub my arms, trying to warm myself over a tea light, ignoring the blazing fire in the garden. Shooting stars dance across the galaxy for my delight while I dig for my triple-A battery-operated flashlight – to enhance the light. I attempt to combat the looming stack of failures. Save the scrap of kindling; use the medieval manuscript instead. Burn away the truth until I’m too blinded to see.

That I’m decorating walls with kitchen scraps and tossing the priceless Van Gogh. Sleeping on a concrete floor next to a plush, King-sized, silk-sheeted bed. The world revolves around my Earth instead of the brilliant, firstborn Sun. As if my shadow held the same colorful brilliance as his visage. As if the weight of my failures could compare to the vast canyon of His proffered grace, fire, treasure, or truth. Open your eyes and look away to see.

So that's what I've been learning. It's a daily challenge to look at Jesus instead of my problems or my issues, but it's worth it. I have joy again. And amazingly, the things I was passed over for don't seem that important anymore. The complaining students have been given an outlet and appear to have quieted down. I never want to stop staring intently into His face and gaining His perspective!

Cuneiform anyone?

I am so ashamed that I didn't post at all during November. Here are some snapshots, especially from our 6th grade Cuneiform tablet making and Fall Party. Soon I'll post something more thoughtful. Promise! (It's almost break time.)